getting creative while staying in

Pet Space (2018)

This year's Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit is cancelled. It was set for early August, but as they wisely point out:

"There is no way to know where we’ll be as a nation in August. But what we do know is that for many Summit attendees, a week, even a day, without income is often catastrophic. People will have used up personal time from work, and some will have had to shelter in place with no income at all. Already negatively impacted by FOSTA, many sex workers are now without any income or access to community resources. Our ability to fundraise for much-needed scholarships is limited right now, as our communities give their time, talents, and treasures to mutual aid in this crisis. Given the circumstances, the individuals who will benefit the most from the Summit programming will be least likely to be able to attend."

(Ricci Joy Levy, President/CEO, Woodhull Foundation) 

I was looking forward to attending, hopefully volunteering again, and even hosting a sober meetup at the conference. I was holding out hope that things would be "back to normal" again (some version of normal) by August. But the future changes daily.

I realize I am very privileged. My nesting partner's job continues to support us both; we are both healthy, and we still have access to beautiful fresh food -- and the internet, streaming video, and our lovely home library. My plan for this season was to knuckle down and work on my writing, and now with the recent success of my Adderall, I am actually doing that. Most days now, I manage to pry myself away from social media's endless dissection of the pandemic (at least for a few hours!) and plunge deeper into my work-in-progress than I had previously managed to do.

I have no idea whether any of my tension and anxiety can be attributed to the Adderall -- of course everyone else is tense and anxious too. Unfortunately, refreshing social media over & over, getting every last "tip" and update on the pandemic, FEELS useful -- when in reality, it mostly just winds me into tighter knots.

My nesting partner has observed that I'm sleeping better than I did before the Adderall. Maybe it's because I'm drinking less coffee? (Or, he suggested slyly, I'm focusing better on being asleep.)

Things I'm doing that ARE useful, if only as self-care: Cleaning house. Decluttering; choosing books to donate to school lunch programs (still open even though the schools are not) or to put in the Little Free Library on the corner. Writing postcards and notes to distant friends. Catching up on my mending. Cooking as frugally as possible, with minimal waste. And yes, washing my hands a lot -- and then moisturizing.

One of my ideas for the proposed sober meetup at Woodhull was to give each person a set of two matched charms or pins (maybe by modifying pairs of cheap earrings). One bit of bling could go on their conference badge, as a subtle signal to other sober attendees. The second bauble would be attached to a stretchy loop that could be put around a cup or glass. That way, while they're mingling at "Bubbles and Burlesque" or other booze-accompanied events during the weekend, they could easily keep track of their own nonalcoholic beverages.

If anyone is reading this and would like your own prototype set of sobriety bling, send me a message and I will make you something! (If you're not practicing sobriety, comment anyway & I will send you a photo postcard or something else random.)

Stay safe, and stay home if you can! The Dildorks are all about "sexual distancing" (and still staying connected) this week. I also recommend the free coronavirus coverage at The Atlantic.